WORLD OF ART

The Worst and Most Decadent Art Show of the Year. Rubbish and Decadence of the Modern Art in England!!

By F. Gibons and Allison Robert.

Some investment bankers lead a varied life. If 35-year-old Emma Chan is not clinching deals at her desk, or snowboarding in Switzerland, she can be found chatting to celebrities on London's South Bank - in the nude. Chan, from Twickenham, and her boyfriend Rob, who is also an investment banker, spent last Tuesday evening upstaging Nigella Lawson, Stephen Fry and Hugh Grant at the opening of the Saatchi Gallery in County Hall. She was one of 160 'extra ordinary, ordinary' people who volunteered to take their clothes off in public for the American artist Spencer Tunick. 'It was so liberating. I just feel so lucky to be one of the few who did it,' she said. Chan and her fellow nudists were tempted into participation by the offer of a signed photograph of the event and they were not paid. The disparate group had been recruited through a listings magazine after art collector Charles Saatchi secretly commissioned Tunick to create a nude tableau to launch his contemporary art gallery. 'I automatically applied to join in,' said Chan. 'I had already taken part in his Greenwich installation with my sister, although I had never done anything else like it before that.' Along with the other volunteers, Chan and her boyfriend were asked to take their clothes off and lie flat on the terrace of County Hall as the sun set.

Photo: Trace by Jenny Saville (1993-94)

After their exposure, they were invited to the champagne party inside - on condition they keep their clothes off. 'At first when we heard we could go into the party as long as we went nude, we all said no,' recalled Chan. 'But then, after the photographs had been taken, our adrenalin was running so high that we just went in. We all thought "Well, we are art and these people are here to see art". Mann: "The first floor is the most sensitive part of Knott's building from an English Heritage point of view, so we have had to tread very carefully." The funny thing was, I didn't feel naked at all.' Strolling past Jade Jagger and Tracey Emin, Chan found herself being photographed with Channel 4 news presenter Jon Snow. 'People talked to us about what was on the walls,' she said. 'But I looked around at one point and there were three women taking photographs of me.' The fact that Chan had already taken part in another Tunick tableau makes her something of a veteran. The artist prefers to work with newcomers. 'I don't really use the same people,' he said. 'I try to stay away from nudist organizations. On Tuesday they were just everyday people and they often have strong reactions because it might be the first time they are nude in public. They each have their own reactions to participation. Most people think they can predict what it feels like, but it's a collective, new experience for the body.' The Saatchi gallery occupies 40,000 sq foot of space in London's Edwardian County Hall. Its prime position on the South Bank is opposite the Palace of Westminster. The building was designed in 1908. In New York, where Tunick lives, he customarily appeals for helpers by handing out flyers on the street. 'I never wanted to have the same people following me around, so I just hand them out. Occasionally someone finds out about it, but it is usually fresh people who take part.' One of the newcomers last week was also the oldest participant. Sixty-one-year-old Jane Roberts from Winchester has never had any interest in public nudity, but took the train to London on Tuesday to disrobe on the South Bank. 'I didn't even know it was the opening of the Saatchi Gallery,' she said. 'But once we were all there was such a good atmosphere. Spencer was very reassuring.' Roberts also joined revelers at the party. 'I couldn't believe I was walking around naked with all these famous people. Lots of people congratulated us. I did it because I firmly believe the body is something of beauty and in a way this was a challenge to people. I thought, "I am old, fat and short - come on, accuse me!" No one has done more to shape modern British art. But the so-called Super collector has as many critics as admirers. In the most revealing portrait of the 21st-century Medici, Jonathan Jones goes in search of the real Charles Saatchi. Charles Saatchi stands on the steps of the Marriott Hotel inside London's County Hall, looking down into the circular courtyard. In the middle of this hollow space is a turfed ziggurat, bright green in the afternoon sun. He is telling me about what lives below it: two and a half million rats. This appears to please him hugely. Two and a half million rats under the building in which he is about to open his new art gallery. It reminds me, oddly, of a previous conversation about rats. When I spoke to the curators of Tate Modern on the eve of its opening three years ago, they told me with some embarrassment that the hordes of rats from Bankside power station had fled to a nearby council estate. Perhaps all this tells you is that if you live by the Thames, you'd better not be scared of rats. But I can't help thinking that the two contrasting images - Saatchi gloating about all his rats and Tate Modern vanquishing theirs - represent two versions of art about to do battle beside the river: the Tate's high-minded vision of a politicised and serious contemporary art, and the rather more ratty and gothic version in the collection of Charles Saatchi, with its rotting cow head, dead shark, child murderer and porn cuttings.